I started personal training with Nina on Thursday, October 15. On Thursday, October 29, following my fifth workout session with her, I felt incredible. Or, as I said to her in an email, “I FEEL FUCKING AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

In that short amount of time, I had doubled my reps and gone from the yellow (easiest) to green (next hardest) band, and everything was just easy and flowing, without pain interfering.

After the session, I not only felt strong and powerful, and I not only had sudden amnesia about what it feels like to be in pain, but I also felt the sense/vibration of parts of my personality that had been snowed under by pain, for over a decade.

Then on Friday, October 30, two people jammed past me in a narrow passageway at Office Depot, and whamo! I was in setback mode, with pain jacked up all over the damn place. I did really well responding to it – blogging to get the angries out, then accepting the reality and laying low for a couple of days – resting, sleeping, icing, and dancing.

On Sunday, Nov 2, Iate at night, I got wicked nerve pain in my left thigh; and I was suddenly hobbling, hanging on to dressers, tables, and other random furniture just to get to the bathroom. While I did dance it out, I had no idea if I would be able to walk the next day – meaning, I didn’t know if I could even show up to my personal training session.

Even if I were to park in the handicapped space at my gym, I still would have to walk a long stretch to get to the gym entrance, then another long stretch to get to the elevator. Because accessibility kind of overlooks people who are somewhere between totally able-bodied and wheelchair-bound. (Not to mention there’s a still a long way to go to make life accessible to people in wheelchairs.)

Fortunately, I woke up on Monday able to walk. I took the elevator, however, instead of the stairs, because I still hadn’t totally recovered from the setback.

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