By: Loolwa Khazzoom, Founder, Dancing with Pain

December 17th, 2012 • Living with Chronic PainPrint Print

In this climate of New Age bullying, where people have decided that we choose our life circumstances (even those out of our control) and that we create our realities (ditto on the out of control bit), I feel so very vulnerable, when I openly share my experience of injury, pain, and suffering, as well as when I openly call out and challenge social behaviors that contribute to the injury, pain, and suffering of myself and others.

We are living in a time where condemnation trumps compassion, and where spiritual smugness is at the throne – at least in the world of holistic health, which is the circle where I run. For this reason, when I share a story of triumph through debilitating pain that nearly tore my life apart, so many people focus not on my fierceness, courage, and tenacity, but rather, on the situation that created the pain in the first place. In other words, they judge me by my circumstances instead of by my character. In addition, when I offer up my story, to help raise awareness of how we can all be more sensitive and awake and considerate of each other, I very well may get judged by the fact that people in my story were unkind to me – as if I were responsible for creating their actions towards me.

This attitude is FUCKED. It actively encourages self-flagellation, and it actively discourages outspokenness. Abuse, trauma, and insanity flourish in silence. Behold the feminist movement: When women started sharing personal stories, they discovered that the personal was political – ie, it was not them or their particular lives, but rather, there was a social steam-roller out to collectively squash women.

The New Age bullies can fuck themselves and their Law of Attraction cohorts. I will not be silent, even when I feel vulnerable. And I encourage you to speak up as well. Tell your story. The more we speak up, the more we are seen, the more knowledge we have, the more we find each other and the more power we have to change this crazy-assed world.


Nathan B November 3rd, 2013

Society is definitely messed up.  I’ve been passed over for jobs, told that I’m faking and experienced a whole mess of other depression inducing side effects of chronic pain.  I feel like I’m being judged on my pain condition, not on my character or accomplishments.

Loolwa Khazzoom November 20th, 2013

I totally get it! I think you will resonate with this blog post that speaks on topic. Thanks for taking the time to reply!

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